I came across this - I must have written it a while ago, but it still seems to hold some relevance:

The Games We Play

I have been convinced that most of the activity associated with church is, in fact, a game. Stand up, sit down, say the words, adopt the posture, attend the meetings, play the game. Mostly you can get by just fine in the church community playing by the rules. No-one ever writes them down, you just learn them by observation, you conform. Relationships within the church are very deep and meaningful – until you break one of the rules of the game. Sin is ok, there’s a defined route back from sin, but not from breaking the unwritten rules. You become a risk, unpredictable, a wild card. Predictability is the Holy Grail of the game. Move from one tradition (denomination) to another and you see the game being played with subtle differences. Those who espouse freedom of worship are, in some ways, the most predictable. Certain elements will always be present and the rules of the game demand the right responses from the players. Fail to give those responses and you run the risk of being offered ‘ministry’.
Does it matter? I think it does, but it only matters because the players don’t realise they are in the game. Authenticity demands an acknowledgement that the game is being played, and an acknowledgement that it doesn’t have to be played. Authenticity demands an acknowledgement that reality has its existence outside the game.
The game is so subtle that those players who begin to see the fact of the game and decide to break free, simply start another game with the rules slightly skewed. Another set of acceptable behaviour. Another set of appropriate responses.
Why does the game exist? I think it is because we have an inbuilt need to relate to God, and the act of relating has become so unnatural for us that we need a form of behaviour that is guaranteed to cause it to occur. The game provides an environment and a forum in which we can show each other that we are relating to God. Outside the game we are cast adrift with no anchor, no reference points and no way to measure whether or not we are relating to God. In the game we are reassured.
The question I ask is this: within the game, is that relationship with God real? Or is it a relationship with the game? The problem is that those caught up in the game have no way of measuring reality – it has become embodied in the game. To obtain some form of objectivity it is necessary to stop playing the game, but within the game there are long term consequences for those who stop playing. Dialogue with those who refuse to play is difficult because the game has conditioned responses for non-players.